Movies, TV, and Audio 7 Comments

5 point review: Justice League Trailer

As a reminder, I like watching movies — and trailers about movies — but I’m also lazy and spending an awful lot of time in Mass Effect: Andromeda at the moment, so here’s a five-point review for the new Justice League trailer.

  1. With very few exceptions, Zack Snyder has been trying to make the same movie over and over again and he still doesn’t understand why we don’t love him for it. His grimdark, chaotic, “bros will be bros” artistic vision was okay in The 300 when it was new and we didn’t think about it too much, but at this point it feels pretty tired. For whatever reason DC Comics has embraced this idea across their feature film platform, perhaps as a response to the more squeaky clean blockbuster shine of the Marvel movies, but again I feel it’s kind of a non-starter at this point. It didn’t work for Suicide Squad, and that’s the movie where it should have worked the best. Stop trying to make Crank-With-Superpowers happen, Gretchen.
  2. Maybe I’m just old, but I’m kind of feeling tired, middle-age Batfleck. Rumor has it that the actor has mentally checked out of these movies, but it’s thematically appropriate. In a related point, why does Batman have machine guns oh my god you guys Batman doesn’t kill people. That’s his whole jam! Even in the Chris Nolan movies he just blew up conspicuously empty parked cars! NO THANK YOU.
  3. I sure hope the digital effects on Cyborg look better in the final film. (This is another Snyder-ism. I know, practical effects are for old people, Zack, but they can also look a lot less shimmery.)
  4. Do I have to watch Batman v. Superman to know why the leader of the Justice League isn’t in this, a Justice League movie? Because I’m not going to.
  5. I hope Wonder Woman and her associated movie are good, but sign me up for 2018’s Aquaman flick and two hours of Jason Momoa jumping around time-tridenting things in the face and dropping sweet burns on rich old dudes. Mmmmmhmmmm.

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7 Comments

  • Reply
    The Claw
    March 28, 2017 at 2:20 pm

    I finally watched Batman v. Superman when it popped up on Netflix. It wasn’t good, that’s for sure.. but it wasn’t unwatchable. I mean, watching it probably won’t kill you or cause any major organs to fail. You could give it a go if you want to know where Superman is.

    • Reply
      Jessica Cook
      March 28, 2017 at 2:31 pm

      In truth it does totally seem like the kind of movie I would watch on Netflix late one night, while drinking, particularly with first-hand accounts that it does not lead to immediate organ failure.

      • Reply
        Wilhelm Arcturus
        March 28, 2017 at 3:10 pm

        It was an okay for a Friday night movie. We have a tradition of watching bad movies on Friday night, where “bad” means “somebody on the couch doesn’t want to watch it but what else do we have planned?” It got better reviews in our house than “Soul Plane.”

        • Reply
          Jimbo
          April 23, 2017 at 11:25 pm

          So excited I found this article as it made things much quecrik!

  • Reply
    pkudude99
    March 28, 2017 at 5:48 pm

    BvS wasn’t great, but I saw it in the theater once, then watched it again at home with my wife. I dind’t think it was awful either time, but I also don’t care to rewatch it either.

    also, while none of the trailers show him, it’s a VERY open secret that Superman is also in this movie. His name is listed in the cast credits any time you care to look and he was also in attendance of the Justice League panel at SDCC with a “speical reveal” that was set up to specifically show that OF COURSE he’s in it…. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eq_yEpbPOMg

  • Reply
    Zhemmie
    March 29, 2017 at 11:19 pm

    Also watched BvS on Netflix on a Friday night – also did not cause major organ failure unless you count my brain checking out about halfway through. Between the dark colours and labyrinthine plot, I just found myself bored through most of it. Which one would think would NOT BE POSSIBLE in a movie called Batman vs Superman. Hopes are not high for Justice League…

    • Reply
      Lily
      April 23, 2017 at 11:46 pm

      Concorso con Mawi sulla pornografia, ma questo è un video di una bella ragazza in bikini che balla.Non ci vedo nulla di strano o anti femminista, è lì che si diverte, ed in spiaggia si vedono donne più &qtu;tgnude&quoo; di così.

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